Not Quite There

With all we've had going on in the past 2 months, sometimes it's hard for me to imagine our whole family isn't quite adjusted to life in the States yet.  It's been a busy 2 months with visits to grandparents, wheat harvest, swimming lessons, Vacation Bible School, and hitting our favorite hot spots and restaurants here on the Big River...not to mention unpacking, settling in, and the arrival of our shipment of household goods from Brazil.  Oh, and let's not forget the 2 rounds of the flu, sore throats, colds, and the rashes we've moved through since getting back...just catching up on American germs.  Then there is the basement construction/finishing project, sorting and downsizing our collection of miscellaneous "stuff" that we don't need, preparing for baby, preparing to start school....it's been busy, to say the least.  And so we carry on, assuming everyone is 100% in this new life we call "American." 

Sometimes it's hard to remember that one of us is really more Brazilian than American.  One of us
only remembers people, food, and places in Brazil.  And while it's been a fun "vacation" for her to experience all that the US has to offer, 8 weeks later, she's still ready to go back.  She asks me from time to time (as recently as yesterday), "When can we leave this house?"  Never jumping to conclusions, I ask where she's like to go (is this cabin fever or Brazil-sick?).  The answer is always the same...."To our red house."  Even though I already know, I ask why.  The answers vary but surround the theme "familiar."  She misses our toys there (most of which are already here and in play), she talks about our maid, she wants to go to a certain park, even though the parks here, at least in my adult mind, are far superior.  She wants Brazilian pizza, rice and beans, our favorite Saturday lunch spot.  She wants the life that was familiar and comfortable to her.

When DaddyHealy went back on a work trip a few weeks ago, she wanted to know when we were going.  M wants to go back too, but "not yet."  D thinks it'd be nice to visit again "some day."  It seems their ages reflect how much they remember from the States, which is tied to how much they are re acclimated, and willing to let go of our former life.  Daddy and I have our moments.  Being back in the town earlier this month made DaddyHealy a bit emotional over what will never again be a part of our life.  I miss the pace of life.  But we both spend a lot of time being grateful that we are, in the end, Americans, and are blessed to be able to live here in the comforts and liberties that go with being a United States citizen.

So, we wait.  We reflect on how excited, yet out of place we felt when first arriving in Brazil and imagine H is feeling some of that.  We know new school routines and a new baby will upset the flow once again in the coming weeks.  So we just snuggle more, remember together, look at pictures, talk about the future, make her rice and beans and pray.  I still believe without a doubt we've all been changed for the better by moving to Brazil, and I feel the same about coming home.  I know we'll be adjusted eventually, even if we're not quite there yet.