Shopping Experiences

Well, since I still can't upload pictures, I'm moving on (for now) to some photo-less posts.

I don't think I've mentioned much about grocery shopping.  My shopping habits have changed dramatically since moving here.

For the most part, I do my shopping at a grocery store that, while small, and incomplete, is very much like what you probably shop at in the States.  There is a bakery, though the pastries, cakes, and some of the breads are quite different.  We have a meat counter, which would be mostly unrecognizable.  The cuts of meat here (other than chicken and ground beef) are quite a bit different. For the most part I have bought meat only from the case of already packaged items, so I can see what I am getting, instead of having to ask for a certain cut of meat. We buy our milk off the shelf, at room temperature.  It is valid for 3 or 4 months.  We buy our eggs off the shelf too, though I always store them in the fridge at home.

There is a deli, but only a case of pre-packaged meats and cheeses. Mozzarella and parmesan cheese, ricotta, ham and salami dominate. Cheese is in a block or slices. No bags of pre-shredded anything. There are a few other cheeses, and occasionally "smoked bird" lunch meat, which I am assuming is chicken. Cheese variety is one of the things I miss the most.

There is a lot of popcorn, a variety of herbs for medicinal teas and beverages.  There is a long aisle of pasta and some incredibly horrible pre-made pasta sauces.  There are very few canned fruits and vegetables. It is very difficult to find canned tomato products, such as tomato sauce and diced tomatoes, which I have always considered a staple in my cooking.

Crackers and cookies abound.  There are about 10 varieties of breakfast cereal, and most of them contain the word "frosted" in the name.  Granola is big here, and I buy a lot of oatmeal. Chocolate comes in large bars or blocks.  There is milk, semi-sweet and occasionally some with crisp rice or cashews. The rest of the candy aisle we have not found worth spending money on.

There are tons of fresh fruits and vegetables.  They may or may not be fit to eat.  The grocery store, at least in our town, doesn't put a lot of emphasis on keeping the produce aisles appealing.  I can pick up 25 apples before I find 5 that are worth buying.  Rotten or moldy fruit or swarms of gnats are not typical concerns.  It is hard to find seedless grapes, I've never seen seedless watermelon.  The lettuce is brought in fresh from hydroponic farms every day.  The tables are heaped with potatoes, onions, garlic, cabbage, carrots and seasonal fruit...papayas, mangos, tangerines, oranges, pineapples, limes, and always a good supply of bananas.  Unless they are out, which is not really that uncommon.  Do not look for a hot pepper.  It doesn't exist.

There is a very long aisle of beans and rice.  How many brands of basic rice do you suppose there are at a US grocery store?  I would guess 2, max of 3.  Here there are dozens.  Naturally, dried beans are popular, and cheap.  The most popular is black beans, but also to be found are brown beans (similar to pinto), white beans, kidney beans, and lentils.

We have your basic dry staples, sugar, flour, salt, a lesser selection of spices, oil, vinegar, and so on.  There are flours we don't recognize, like flour of mandioca - yucca root.  There are at least 4 varieties of  ground corn or cornmeal for various purposes, including the popular polenta.  Vanilla extract is hard to come by, but there is an abundance of powdered vanilla essence, and vanilla sugar. We have cake mix, but it's horrible. We have boxed jello and pudding, but nothing "instant."  Baking powder, yeast, etc all come in very small packages. Rows of sweetened condensed milk (in a carton, not a can) and likewise with whipping cream, which, naturally, is ultra-pasteurized and sold at room temperature, too.  Ketchup, mustard, mayo, even in brands we recognize. 

There is a dairy aisle, 20 choices of margarine, and usually 2 choices in butter.  Yogurt brands abound, but flavors do not.  Primarily, we have seen choices of strawberry, plain, and plum, with an occasional seasonal variation, like papaya with oat.  No cottage cheese, or sour cream, but we've found some relative substitutes.  Processed cheese spread is popular, as is refrigerated "fresh" pasta.

Frozen food is limited to pizzas, a few appetizer items, occasionally boneless chicken breast, french fries and at times, vegetables, such as corn or peas.  We also have very small selection of (in my opinion) really horrible and overpriced ice cream.

There are no canned soups, condensed or otherwise. Very few salad dressings, and we don't like any of them. Rarely sauces or marinades (think bbq, teriyaki, chutney) can be found. No canned beans. There are no boxes of mac & cheese, but oddly plenty of ramen noodles. No peanut butter, but plenty of jam. Meal in a box? no. Dry seasoning packets for pot roast, gravy, chili seasoning, chop suey, chicken a la king? No. There really is very little to make a quick and easy meal. This is quite a difference from Walmart, whose shelves are lined with boxes claiming "ready in 15 minutes" or "just add ground beef for a complete meal." 

Aaaah, quick and easy, yet highly processed American diet....I do not miss you.  More on that in a later post.

My biggest frustrations with shopping is lack of supply.  My typical experience is either: You find it, you love it, you never find it again, or: You find it, you love it, when you go back for more, the shelf is empty....for 3 weeks.  It really doesn't seem to matter if it is a popular item of not.  If they are out, they are just out.  I seem to be the only one getting riled up about this.  Brazilians just accept it.

My favorite thing about shopping here?  Someone ALWAYS carries out my groceries.  Or I can just have them delivered to my house (carried in) for about US$2.

This post grew into far more than I planned, so separately, I'll share with you how my cooking and our shopping and eating habits have changed since we arrived here.

Beach Baby

One of the beauties of being in Michigan is going to mass at my childhood church right on the shores of the lake.  Although spending a day at the beach was one of the items on our Michigan to-do list that never materialized, it was impossible to avoid all together as we stepped out of mass on our last day there overlooking the lake.  We couldn't resist a short walk in the sand, which turned into dipping in our toes, which turned into wet dress hems, which turned into wonderful memories.

This is one of my absolute favorite photos of our 19 days in the States.  I have one more, but can't get it to load.  I'll have to keep trying.



Baby H tentative, yet excited, about the feel of sand between her toes.

 

 

The List

As I had mentioned, there was a long, long list of what the kids wanted to do at Grandmas.  Honestly, it wasn't any different than what they want to do when we visit from the Big River, but isn't that what a grandma's house is all about?

If I asked the kids what is special about Grandma M, without a doubt they would list: her gator, her swimming pool and her lollipops. It doesn't get much better.  Well, maybe it did, since the cousins finally moved in across the street!

The Precious Few

Our visit to Michigan was hot and humid....and oh, so short.  That was the reality of our whole visit, really.  Not enough days, not enough hours.  There were important friends we weren't able to see, favorite places of the children's that we did not get to.  I cannot believe how precious few pictures we took while we were in the States.  I guess we were busy etching memories on our hearts.  We talk a lot about our visit.  We keep the memories fresh.  We talk about what we are going to do when we go back, what we missed this year, or didn't have time for this visit.  Look out Grandma, they are already making a list!

But, here is one of the things we did do:

Inform Grandpa (immediately upon arrival!) of our family rule on teasing: (if you tease 3 times you have to give the other person your dessert!).  Let's just say he needed the reminder.....

 

 

 

Moments

There were so many moments I would not have wanted to miss while we were in the States.  This one, with my grandma and her namesake, is one of them.  What a precious photo.  I can tell how much my M adores the senior M, the same way I did when I was a small child.  I remember she taught me you can actually make a milk shake at home!  She so often handed me a coffee can and we picked blueberries until her coffee can and my belly were both full and then we went back to the house and baked a blueberry cake.  She taught me a trick for easy buckling of overalls.  She made me a cabbage patch doll.  She let me have sleep overs.  She knew how to make her own slip and slide!  I was pretty sure there was nothing she could not do!
And now my M shows the same admiration.  I love that she knows how amazing my grandma is!

Reservations

I had long awaited, and sometimes dreaded, our trip to the US.  We've been planning it since before we even left for Brazil, but as it neared I wondered if the good in it could possibly outweigh the difficult.  While that may be tough for those we love to understand, I was very much afraid. 

I feared travel with a family of 5.  I feared overtired, disjointed, confused kids.  I feared a baby who remembers life in Brazil far better than life in the US...

....and I feared not wanting to leave.  I feared that being in the states would remind me that our "comfortable" life in Brazil is really not all that comfortable.  I was afraid my kids would decide they like the US better and beg to stay.  I feared they would cling to loved ones and I'd have to pry them away to get on the plane.  I dreaded saying goodbye all over again. 

And then there is settling back in, going back to school, remembering to speak Portuguese, culture shock all over again, nightmares, cranky kids, and other adjustment/coping behaviors.  It is hard enough to return from a 3 week vacation and get back into the routine without the complexity of international travel and living 2 lifestyles, leaving loved ones for another year.

Our travel is not easy.  At best it takes 23 hours.  On average it takes a day and a half.  We left our home at 5 AM, drove 7 hours, flew, waited for half a day, flew again...all night this time, waited, 2 hour bus ride and finally arrived.  H never slept more than 40 minutes at a time during our travels.  People (I mean single or childless people) complain about how hard it is to sleep on an overnight plane.  Try to get 3 little ones to all pass out from exhaustion at the same time so mom and dad can close their eyes for a few minutes as well!  It didn't really happen. But we expected it and we survived.  Knowing what was coming, we started praying for patience for the trip weeks in advance. 

We spent the 3 weeks in 3 different states, 3 different houses, 3 different beds.  All places we've spent countless days and nights, but a lot of change just the same....not to mention 15 hours of driving between them.

Overall, our visit went exactly as I expected, and then, around every corner was a surprise or two.  H, who is fast approaching 2, hardly ate the "foreign" food, and overall slept pretty poorly for 3 weeks.  But my cautious, clinging-to-mommy's-leg little girl allowed herself to be lead away for a gator ride with a Grandma she likely didn't remember within an hour of arriving. I was in awe.

D, 6 1/2 now, didn't want to let anything go, not people, places, things, and oh, certainly not the food.  But honestly, a week back in Brazil he settled right back in.  His life is already full with routines and life here.

I was surprised at how little 4-year-old M remembered.  These are Grandmas' houses...places she's spent many a night, and at every house I had to show her where to find the bathroom.  It really blew me away.  I never expected that.  At our own home I told her to get a cup out of the dishwasher, and she stood in the kitchen staring a bewildered stare at the empty sink.  In the last 11 months, the only dishwasher we have had is Daddy!  She could not fathom where to find a dishwasher, and probably didn't even know what one was.  When we went to McDonalds I had to tell her what kind of food she could choose from.  I cannot believe how much she forgot.

But oh, did we make memories.  Within 3 days I was convinced.  No matter what laid ahead on our travels and return, these days were important.  They were important for remembering, for putting more concrete images into that 4-year-old head, for reacquainting everyone with people, food, customs that we will ultimately be returning to.  For remembering just how blessed we really are.  And even, surprisingly, for remembering what we love about Brazil. 

Home.

Home is such a confusing word for my family right now.  It's not that we feel homeless.  Quite the contrary, we feel incredibly blessed to have 2 or maybe more places to call home.  But what is "home"? What makes a place a "home"?

Fresh from a visit to the US, we have been using the word "home" to mean 4 or more locations over the past several weeks.  We went on a trip home (to the US), we went to my home (where I grew up), we went to our home (our house on the big river), then daddy went home (his boyhood abode), then we came back home (our house in Brazil). 

We had conversations like "when we get back home...(to Brazil)" or "when we move home...(to the US)" or, "You can have a snack when we get home (to Grandma's house)"  "We left that toy at home (choose a location!)" The kids kept saying "which home?"  Understandably confused....I feel that way sometimes too.  M has taken to calling our US house by the street name.  We call our place here "our red house" and so on.  Really, it didn't start with our US visit, but that really magnified it. 

It goes beyond our family too.  We chatted with another expat yesterday, and she asked "how was your trip home?"  Since she also lives here, I naturally assumed she meant our flights back to Brazil.  I started to answer regarding the long flight, the airport closures, going through customs with 6 bags, 7 carry-ons and 3 kids, the chauffeured car that picked us up, etc and then I noticed her bewildered look.  She was talking about the US "home." In other words, how was our trip back to the US?

I wondered why I didn't see it that way.  Am I that settled here?  I honestly don't feel uprooted.  Though I know I am most certainly NOT Brazilian, and do not have any intentions whatsoever of staying here beyond this assignment, it was not particularly hard for me to return, other than tearful goodbyes to loved ones.  But I have the One who is everywhere, I have my one life mate and my 3 little people.  I am in a place (at least figuratively speaking) that God intends me to be.  And while I was so glad to be able to see and spend time with family and friends, to make new memories with them all for our kids, and to go back to some places that we love, our home is where we are.  We prayed hard about the decision to do this, to come here, to uproot, to adjust and then uproot again.  We felt divine guidance in our decision.  Maybe that's why being here, living here, doesn't feel so hard to me.  It's hard to explain. 

So, we've been talking about the difference between a house and a home.  We've been discussing if things, or people, or places make a home.  We've made verbal lists about what we would need in a place to be able to call it our home.  (The list is far shorter than it would have been before our move here.)  And we've been talking about taking Him with us, wherever we go, and making sure that where we are is where He wants us to be.  I guess that provides an awful lot of stability in a seemingly uprooted life.

(...and if you're feeling cheated because there are no posts or pictures from our trip, just bear with me.  I have a lot on my "to blog" list!)